Reading and Growth
by Roger (Gold)
"Education Is The Key To Unlock The Golden Door To Freedom"
~George Washington Carver~
I have come to Freedom many times to read new posts and perhaps offer advice and encouragement to someone in the midst of a temporary struggle. Perhaps it's with a new quitter with just a few days or weeks of experience behind them. Possibly it's one of our more seasoned members. Although their time quit is never a consideration if they are to be offered advice or not, we automatically dive in and offer a helping hand or encouraging word. That is what Freedom (and Turkeyville) are all about.
Many times I see within that post a very common occurrence. The person asking for help may state, " I don't come here that often anymore" or "I haven't been reading much lately or not at all." While visiting Freedom and reading is not a requirement for membership, I believe the lack of reading or education is a factor directly related to how strong and independent our quits are to become along with how fast mentally and emotionally we adjust to our new life.
From the very first puff or chew that led us down that long road of our addiction, to our final puff when we made the decision to take our lives back, our mental and physical self was in a constant state of change or modification process. Setting aside the physiological changes taking place within our bodies I want to focus on the psychological alterations that took place touch briefly on the physical traits or characteristics we develop along the way.
For most of us, that dark path we traveled called addiction began as children longing for acceptance and maturity or just being plain defiant. We slowly developed character traits, patterns and habits reflective of our addiction to nicotine.
For instance, how we held that cigarette in our hands or between our lips. How a person, whose delivery device was a can of chew, tapped the top of the container three times prior to opening and delivering it. How others would take a cigarette out of the pack and tap it multiple times on the pack or a hard surface to pack it tighter. The way we took that first puff and rolled our eyes or lifted our heads to expel the smoke, expressing our delight and relief as the effects of withdrawal were temporarily quenched.
Side by side with the physical changes we instigated came the psychological ones as well. We began to alter our personality to accompany our newly acquired persona. We began to view ourselves differently. We came to believe that our whole being revolved around our addiction. Rather than seeing our self as we truly were, addicts addicted to a highly addictive substance, we viewed ourselves as a new person. A person, mature in our own way, sporting a new and dynamic personality.
The method of delivery we chose quickly became an integral part of physical and psychological being. It was who we were, not what we had become. We accepted the physical act of introducing nicotine to our system just as we accepted puberty, our eye or hair color or outward appearance. We planned our lives around our need to feed.
We entertained a belief our social skills would be nonexistent without our cigarette. After all, we spent many years molding our personality around it. We believed life could not be enjoyed without nicotine or the man-made device we used to deliver it to our system. Side by side with the commercial advertisements, we glamorized our addiction. We became addicts with distinction, taste and culture.
This false image we spent years creating becomes possibly the hardest aspect of our addiction we may struggle to control upon making that decision to quit. The struggle within to shed that identity becomes a daily process along our journey. Unlike physical withdrawal from nicotine that has a relatively shorter life span or the physiological healing taking place naturally within our framework, our psychological healing may be, for many, the biggest and most difficult challenge to master.
Is there a set answer or method to overcoming this? I don't know that for sure but I will offer my viewpoint based on my own observations and discoveries of my journey. First of all, take a moment to think how a champion figure skater or athlete of any kind makes their way to the top of their game. It is accomplished on a day-to-day basis practicing whatever they do, as well as mental visualizations of what they wish to become.
They don't sit around and expect to achieve without any effort. They understand that to become successful at what they desire, they have to work for it. There are no shortcuts to success! Our quits are much the same. To achieve the comfort we desire, an honest effort must take place.
We now have our fragile dream of becoming a comfortable ex-smoker in control of our addiction. One who is able to live their life to the fullest, each and every day, without the daily feedings along with the false sense of security created within their own mind.
How does that get accomplished? The answer is, we do it by living our lives one day at a time and following some basic principles.
For sake of space, I am just going to touch on one broad and basic concept. This is probably the most given advice at Freedom aside from Joel's concept and truth of "Never Take Another Puff." From the moment you become aware of Freedom or WhyQuit you are advised to do the following:
READ, READ & READ SOME MORE
There is a reason for that. Aside from the truth will set you free or knowledge is power, it works! Our psychological addiction needs to grow well beyond the subsiding demand of our physiological addiction to nicotine. And the physical characteristics and habits that we developed and honed need to be forgotten.
Our physical withdrawal symptoms subside rather quickly and our physical mannerisms more or less disperse on their own. Our physiological healing naturally continues on its own. What this leaves is the balance of growth.
To balance out our journey of healing we need to make the effort to heal our own psychological damage. We need to change our way of thinking to mirror our new way of life. This aspect of healing may need a more direct effort by you to help initiate this change and then follow through with needed reinforcement. All you need to do is begin the process of reconditioning your way of thinking. This is done by living your life on a day-to-day basis along with continued education through reading.
Develop the belief you will achieve the comfort you desire by visually seeing yourself as a comfortable ex-smoker. If you don't believe or want to become comfortable it may take a long time of struggle and anguish to get there.
How long should you spend reading? I have read where 20 minutes a day is sufficient. My suggestion is to do whatever is necessary. Who knows you better than anyone? How important is this quit to you? I am a firm believer in the following truth:
No Matter What Endeavor A Person Takes On, The Success Achieved Is In Direct Proportions To the Effort Spent!
To become a successful ex-smoker do you have to do all I suggested? By no means, but would you wash your car and just wax one side?
It is important to remember there are not any requirements at Freedom to read or post. The only rule is no nicotine. No matter how your journey progresses all you have to practice to remain quit is never take another puff.
One Day At A Time, You Can If You Think You Can!
Roger (Gold)
Knowledge is a Quitting Method
