Baby Steps
Quit expectations skills begin with baby steps.
by John (Gold)
Are you just beginning a new quit? What do you currently expect of yourself? Do you truly believe that you will never ever smoke another cigarette for the remainder of your life? It's a bit hard to believe, isn't it! Then why begin your journey by imposing such distant, remote or unrealistic expectations?
Try this instead. Do you truly believe that you have the ability to not smoke for the next hour or during the next challenge if any? Of course, you do. We all can!
If being honest and realistic with ourselves, then why force our minds to accept the goal of quitting forever when today it seems unrealistic? Why not instead develop an outlook that focuses entirely on remaining successful here and now, by engaging in what we know you are 100% capable of doing - quitting for the next 60 minutes!
In fact, if your definition of success at quitting is to stay quit FOREVER (instead of here and now), the only time you'll achieve victory and be entitled to celebrate is after you've died as an ex-smoker. What good would that do? Who's coming to that party?
Instead, celebrate each hour of freedom and each challenge overcome as the full and complete victory they reflect. Today at Turkeyville, Freedom's successor, you'll hear its 13,000+ members refer to this important quit expectations skill as "baby steps," "one day at a time," or simply as patience.
New babies don't start out by attempting to run or even believing it possible! We each crawled and gradually over time our confidence grew. It's the same with quitting. To begin, strive to be content with crawling just one hour at a time. If you focus on remaining successful for the next 60 minutes, it won't be long until the hours will have built themselves into an entire day of healing.
Most of the anxiety associated with quitting is self-induced. An initial unrealistic goal of quitting FOREVER (like trying to force a newborn baby to run immediately upon birth) can be extremely discouraging and act as anxiety fuel that seems only to magnify the intensity of a craving that would have ended within 3-5 minutes anyway.
Learn to crawl first. There'll be plenty of time later for walking and then running.
Picture yourself as a mountain climber engaged in a steep 72-hour climb to the top. You know that within 72 hours your body will become 100 percent nicotine-free, your brain will be forced to begin re-adjusting to functioning without nicotine, as the worst is now behind you.
But, like the crawling baby, the climb will be on all fours. Would it benefit the climber to allow their mind to constantly remain filled with thoughts about how much further remains to be climbed, or would that only create unnecessary anxieties?
Would it benefit the climber to allow their mind to constantly dwell upon the thought of how far they would fall if they lost their grip, or would that only create unnecessary anxieties?
Baby steps is an expectations skill that allows us to concentrate on remaining successful here and now by doing what we already know we can do - these next few minutes.
It encourages all engaged in climbing withdrawal's mountain to focus upon getting a solid grip on the rocks beneath their hands, knees and feet. It's a mental tool and skill that allows all new quitters to successfully navigate this temporary period of re-adjustment called recovery. Before you know it, you'll join us here on Easy Street, and bask in the ever-growing calm, quiet and comfort beyond.
And there's only one rule, no nicotine here and now. Give your confidence a chance to build. Become skilled at taking baby steps. Just one hour and challenge at a time, yes you can!
John (Gold)
Knowledge is a Quitting Method
